I visited you one last time on Tuesday. I've never seen you so peaceful and contented.
This is such a change from all the years that we've been working together. I remember how bitter we felt sitting in your rented apartment at Orange Grove Road after the 1997 elections. The place has since been turned into swank, upscale serviced-apartments. We were drafting a letter to the United Nations to ask for the monitoring of future elections here.
It was a tedious job recounting everything that had happened: the hounding of Tang Liang Hong, the threats made against voters, and the gatecrashing of polling stations by ministers. The task was made lighter only with the delightful combination of the savoury Indian vadai and Earl Grey you served.
I remember also asking you about the copy of Long Walk to Freedom by Nelson Mandela sitting on your coffee table. You said that once in a long while, there comes a man who achieves greatness without having to cause the suffering of others.
On another occasion, my wife and I visited you at another rented house. From the outside, we could see a few of your shirts hanging by the window ledge on the upper floor. Mei said that she felt sorry that you had to do your own laundry at your age without anyone sharing those chores with you.
This reminds me of the time when we were driving along Serangoon Road and you wanted to stop by to pick up a bunch of flowers. I had asked you what the occasion was. You said it was your wedding anniversary and that your late wife, Margaret, would have liked the bouquet.
Then there was the time when we visited New York City. I was surprised when you mentioned that that was the first time you had set foot in the US. We had checked into this small hotel and struggled with our luggage along the narrow and dingy corridor. And as I fumbled for the key to open the door, I heard you mutter to yourself: "Oh Ben, what have you gotten yourself into?"
My heart sank when I heard you say that. I was feeling a little depressed myself and I was hoping to get some cheer from you. Seeing you so despondent made my own morale wobble.
But I knew that you were feeling depressed and anxious because of yet another lawsuit. As we put our weary heads on the emaciated pillows, you said that they didn't just want to win politically but were determined to also crush us personally.
We made a pact that night that while we may not yet be able to beat them politically, we would not allow them to defeat us on the personal front. They may take away all our possessions, but they will never take away our will to speak up. And then you said that we needed to rest as “tomorrow's another day that we have to fight.”
The next morning I came out from the shower and saw you reading the Bible. We talked a little about the Book of Ecclesiastes. Then you knelt down by the bed to say a prayer and I joined you. We prayed for strength and sustenance.
Rejuvenated, we went down to what New Yorkers call a “deli” for breakfast. I remember you asking me what a bagel was and I said that it was the American version of the vadai. You chortled and we mouthed down a couple of Ham and Cheeses. Actually, I did. You found the bagels a little too hard.
During breakfast we talked about setting up an NGO to advocate transparency and democracy in Singapore. When we came back, we had a bit of a laugh seeing how the gentleman at the Registry of Companies squirmed as he tried to handle our application for the "Open Singapore Foundation".
After rejecting the term "Foundation", "Institute" and a couple of others, the ROC finally allowed the use of "Centre". Thus was born the first human rights NGO in Singapore.
We left New York and you headed south to Florida to visit your son. When you returned, you bought my daughter a little pink teddy bear. It squeaks when you press its tummy. When she was a little older, we told her who bought it for her. She named it “JB Bear" because she couldn't quite pronounce your name.
My wife said that it was funny to think of this cute little pink bear and picture you at the same time, a big elderly man with bushy hair and your trademark "mutton chops". You always made her jump a little whenever your voice boomed through the phone: "Is that you, Mei?"
Several months later, your worst nightmare came true. You were found guilty of defamation again and you now had to vacate your seat in Parliament for the second time. I remember talking to you on the phone after your appeal was rejected. You sounded so crestfallen.
I had asked you if you wanted to talk, but you said that you just wanted to be "alone for a while." The next day we met for lunch near your office at North Bridge Road. We got into a heated argument. I had asked you not to continue paying the money and playing into the hands of Lee and his people.
I knew you were angry at me for saying so, but I also knew that you wanted me to be honest with you. Through the years, we have had our clashes and disagreements. But we always knew that we were locked in spirit and that we would always remain true to each other and to what we believed in. No matter how serious our disagreements, we always stood on the same side.
As you lay down to rest, democracy is not yet at hand. But don't you ever believe those who say that your fight on earth was irrelevant and personal. Nothing could be further from the truth. You have inspired an entire generation of Singaporeans and we will keep the fight going.
We will keep on reaching for that star in the black sky, that shimmering distant star of liberty. If we are closer to touching it, it is because we stand on your shoulders.
Your legacy and walk on earth will not only remain but it will grow. You have left a void that cannot be filled.
I think of that night in New York when we pledged not to let them defeat our persons. You've kept your end of the pact. They may still have the power but, boy, you sure showed them what a fighter for truth is. You leave us with honour and dignity, no one could buy you over and no one did. And even though you did not possess millions in your bank account, the treasure which you have stored is with you today and forever.
Goodbye, Ben, I will miss you.
But even as I mourn your death, I celebrate your life because it has touched mine. You have fought the good fight and now you have been called home to rest. They cannot hurt you anymore. Until we meet again, dear friend, I will always remain
A very touching farewell article to a close friend . I hope that with the passing of JB that more singaporean will read about this great man,about his life, about his struggles and prosecutions by the government and hopefully a thousand JBs will rise up and bring this tiny singapore to a respectable country where not only foreigners heap praises on us for economics advancmeent but also on human right, democracy and a society of caring people.
Anonymous
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Fri, 03 Oct 2008 11:02 am
"Nothing could be further from the truth. You have inspired an entire generation of Singaporeans and we will keep the fight going."
We are inspired but we are still scared.
David
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Fri, 03 Oct 2008 11:04 am
Up close and personal with Chee and jbj.
That is a very nice article. Do write more of it. I sick and disguse of those rotten expensive Lee's memoir lying in the library and in bookstore.
Jaslyn Go
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The Fight will go on...Democracy and Human Rights!
Fri, 03 Oct 2008 11:35 am
Dr Chee..
I been holding back my tears since I received news of his demise early on Tues Morning. Now as I read your article on JBJ, I can no longer fight back my tears. You have shown me another side of JBJ which many of us don't get to know. The loving husband, a Uncle who bring toys to your kids, the friend whom you share a cramp room with in NYC..The fighter who at times felt crestfallen..
This is the Man who throughout his life, tries to fight for his fellow Singaporean to live in a democratic society..a society where people are the power not the government..
Given his background, he could have lead a luxurious life if he choose to be co-opted into the establishment, yet he choose the harder route to bring about more freedom for us..
I last met him on SDP's Hawaiian Nite dinner, I was elated when he could still remember me and shook my hands asking me how am I..That was also my last conversation with him..
Goodbye Mr JBJ, to those who thinks that you are "irrelevant", "not destiny to see through what you are fighting for", I am sure what you have been fighting will not be in vain..
There are people like me, who believe in what you have been fighting for, and will continue to carry on the fight.
I know Mr JBJ will bless us from where he is now..
NOT MY SDP
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Thanks for sharing
Fri, 03 Oct 2008 12:25 pm
Thanks for sharing the personal experience with Mr JBJ.
oo
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Fri, 03 Oct 2008 12:35 pm
JBJ is at a better place now. Farewell, good sir.
Seelan Palay
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Fri, 03 Oct 2008 12:44 pm
A heart-wrenching account. Thank you.
Druid
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Fri, 03 Oct 2008 12:54 pm
Joshua is safe now with the Lord. No draconian tentacles can touch him now.
Eternal rest grant unto him O Lord and perpetual light shine on him.
jeff goh
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JBJ n Dr chee Soon Juan
Fri, 03 Oct 2008 1:14 pm
Dear Dr Chee
After reading this most touching article, I choose to write you here instead of speaking to you..to have something in writing to honour both of you gentlemen.
Despite all the things that have been written about JBJ and you over the years, to potray the bad guys image, I have always believed in and respected both of you and never wavered from that; and never belived what ever was written over the last 17 years or so.
I dont know you from adams. I first met you at Raffles Place, you were all alone selling your first book 'Dare to change" many didnt dare venture to you, I was one of the few that did. You autographed the book dated 19th Aug 1994...you signed "Together lets build the vision...Chee Soon Juan" I still have that book.
I first met JBJ, in the same manner. He too was selling his book, I still have his book too.
Since both that fateful days, My belief,respect and admiration for both you gentleman has grown by leaps and bounds, and no matter what is said and written about you both, I know that JBJ and you Dr chee are,...sincere, genuine, caring gentlemen, and nobody can take that away from me.
I know what you have expressed here comes straight from you heart, and I would like to join you in sharing this grief at this moment.
I last met JBJ at the SDP annual party on 31st August 2008, and I am glad I had the chance to chat with him for a while...and saw him again this 1st Oct, he looked rested and peaceful. I shall see him for the last time this sat.
Take care Dr Chee, and I am sure JBJ would want that too.
Jeff Goh
ah beng
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thank you
Fri, 03 Oct 2008 1:40 pm
Thanks so much for this article. God bless.
Brendan
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St Andrews Cathedral???
Fri, 03 Oct 2008 1:40 pm
It's ironical, just a week ago that area was busting with roars from the F1 event. Too recent for comfort. I hope that it would be peaceful this weekend.
Rainer
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Fri, 03 Oct 2008 2:48 pm
Great letter, Dr Chee, I'm deeply touched
ahsayman
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My personal tribute to JBJ
Fri, 03 Oct 2008 3:02 pm
Sing to the tune of 'My Way'
So now, it's finally here
the passing of dear JBJ
So unexpectedly, so suddenly
at the end of September
My friends, let us all cheer
thru all our tears, he didn't suffer
He went so peacefully
To meet Magaret finally
**
Oh what a man! tho he had lost
political cases in our kangaroo
courts!
He was a saint who had never bent
To despicable acts by a heartless man
Let that be known
When our children'd grown
He did it for our sakes!
And now, to the people I say
you must repay his sacrifices
Recall the sad old man
standing all alone in the little corner
Beckoning to you to buy his book
So he can fight on
for us and our children too
He did it for our sakes!
Albert Ng
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A Touching Farewell Article Indeed
Fri, 03 Oct 2008 3:05 pm
Dear Dr Chee,
Thank you for sharing with us your encounters with the late JBJ. A very touching article indeed.
No words can described the enormous challenges, pains and sacrifices that both JBJ & you make during the course of your political life. I want to say a Big Thank You to both of you for making all the sacrifices.
The road is certainly long and narrow. I stood by your beliefs from Day 1, the day when you launched your 1st book 'Dare To Change' in 1994 selling them at Raffles Place. Since then, I have bought all of your books 'Singapore, My Home Too. To Be Free. The Power of Courage. Those Who Dare (Voices of Asia's Democrats) and the recently launched 'A Nation Cheated'. I have also bought books written by JBJ 'The Hatchet Man of Singapore and Make It Right for Singapore'.
I still remembered both JBJ and yourself told me to concentrate in my working career (I was in my late 20s) when I bought the book from you at Raffles Place and from JBJ at City Hall. From that encounter, I know you guys are genuine and possesses qualities of a true leader (that is so missing these days) to run a country.
In your own words Dr Chee, success will come. It is only a question of when and how.
I look forward to see a more open society in Singapore where one don't have to live in fear as a result of all your party's efforts and the late JBJ's efforts.
And when that day comes, I'm sure the late JBJ will be rejoicing up above.
I want to share some awesome words with everyone here on your website.
'It doesn't matter how long you live, it only matter how well you live'.
'The bridge you burn now, may be the ones you have to cross later'.
Thanks Dr Chee and blessings to you & your family.
Nick
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Fri, 03 Oct 2008 3:15 pm
This should be read by every single Singaporean via the Staits Times.